NHL: The Two Tirds report

Hey motherpuckers, we are back! The NHL All-Star game has come and gone, and each team’s odd seven-to-ten-day break is over. This is the time of the season when the NBA catches up to the NHL in terms of games played. It’s not weird, it’s just a matter of activity. Basketball has a lot of running, but the uniforms don’t carry weight. An NHL player is loaded with game armor, plus skating takes more effort than running, therefore they have more time between games. NHL season starts earlier, but the NBA always catches up.

Now that your February sports lesson is over, let’s take a look at where the NHL stands at their two-tirds mark in the season. Finally, my yard marker team, the Colorado Avalanche and you know well by now, has reached game 55, posting a magnificent shut-out 3-0 win against the Senators… then losing to the Capitals last night – FUUDDGE.. Where does that leave them in the standings? No, no, no my skate-loving friends, we check out the Eastern conference first.

Eastern Conference

Shall we take a look at who won’t make the playoffs first? Let’s do that. As predicted at the halfway point, the Detroit Red Wings are not disappointing me in their failure to do anything this season. They’re fortunate they can remember how to lace up skates, let alone play hockey. The others? We have the New Jersey Devils, who used to be the Colorado Rockies… and may as well have been the baseball Colorado Rockies the way they’re playing… and the aforementioned Ottawa Senators… who the Colorado Avalanche just shut out. To complete this trifecta of tenuous relationships between the bottom three and the Avalanche, let’s harken back to when the Dead Wings were good and the Avalanche cared enough to hate them. Sit back, have a Stroh’s or a Coors, and enjoy this clip. If the link doesn’t work, just type in ‘Patrick Roy vs Mike Vernon” and that’ll get you there. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G7LZbJhi6Fo

Oh and BTW, we are going to add one more team. I believe it is time to knock on the arena door of the Buffalo Sabres and let them know the climb to get into the playoffs is too steep for them at this point so forget about it. They’ve sunk like a rock since the halfway point, going from the 8th spot down to 13th. Zoinks, Scoob! As for the rest…

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Friday Five: Valentines Day Edition

Friday Five: Valentines Day Edition

Welcome to the Friday Five, the brain child of Fancy Boys Club creator Brandon Andreasen. Each week, we will give four questions and a top five list for all the Fancy Boys contributors to tell stories and give horrible top five lists for.

With Valentine’s Day today, we thought we would ask the crew about all things love. Let’s get romantic!

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My Grandpa, The Hero

My Grandpa, The Hero

On this day 65 years ago, Time Magazine, one of the biggest magazines in the country at the time, released their latest issue. Carl Jung, the noted Swiss Psychiatrist, was on the cover. Deep inside the issue is a small article titled “Aviation: For Distinguished Flying.” It was about a United Airlines flight from the month prior that had mechanical issues and crashed into a cornfield in Iowa. Every person from the crash managed to walk away without injury. The pilot of that flight was my grandfather.

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Fancy Boys Go To The Movies: Birds Of Prey

Fancy Boys Go To The Movies: Birds Of Prey

At a cursory glance, Birds Of Prey (and the Fantabulous Emancipation of One Harley Quinn) has a lot going for it, besides the exhausting title. It is the second DCEU to feature a female lead and the second film in DC Comic’s rocky film history to have a female director (Cathy Yan). Margot Robbie reprises her role as Harley Quinn, and she was one of the few positives of the very not-good Suicide Squad. Most importantly, this film takes place in Gotham City and features absolutely zero nipples on a Batman costume.

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XFL Roughneck Report: Houston Roughnecks take the Los Angeles Wildcats by the Nape

XFL Roughneck Report: Houston Roughnecks take the Los Angeles Wildcats by the Nape

Before we get into taking a look at what happened Saturday for game 1, let’s just have an introduction – call it a post-first game introduction – to these Houston Roughnecks. Starting with the logo – a logo looking suspiciously like the old Houston Oilers logo so my assumption is the same “designer” who created this also created Trump’s Space Force logo… or is that Space Farce, I forget. Let’s start with…

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The XFL Has A WWE Problem

The XFL Has A WWE Problem

By most accounts, the XFL had a successful opening weekend. Ratings were decent, the football itself was better than expected, and the league has drawn more early buzz than last year’s failed league, the AAF. The XFL announced that they had sold more season tickets in the week lead up to the season than the AAF sold in the entirety of its existence. High end sports personalities on Twitter such as Mina Kimes and Robert Mays were actively talking about it all weekend.

There were a lot of fun things also involved. They had the coaches mic’ed up and occasionally let us viewers listen in on plays they were calling before they happened. The league also let viewers into the replay room and mic’ed up both the referee and the replay official, giving viewers an amazing amount of access into the thought process that goes into a potential play review. I could go on all day about the different rules that have made the game more fast paced, and before the week is over, I probably will.

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FBC OSCAR COVERAGE, PART X: The Night That Was Parasite

FBC OSCAR COVERAGE, PART X: The Night That Was Parasite

When the smoke had cleared and the dust had settled on the 92nd Academy Awards Sunday night, it was Bong Joon-Ho’s Parasite dominating the field. Yes, it won Best International Feature. That was expected. What was less expected however, were the other three awards it claimed: Best Original Screenplay, Best Director, and Best Picture.

As Bong went up to accept his screenwriting Oscar, I turned to my wife and said, “This could be a huge night for Parasite.” I didn’t realize that I was making one of the more dramatic understatements in the history of me watching the Oscars, which goes back to when I was a child.

Even though Parasite‘s four wins destroyed my chances of winning the Oscar pool I was in AND possibly ruined my credibility as a prognosticator (I went 18-for-24), I cannot help but be ecstatic for Bong. Because not only was Parasite the first foreign-language film to win Best Picture, but for the first time this century (and maybe longer), the winner of Best Picture wasn’t just the best movie nominated, it was the best film that came out all year.

And we haven’t even gotten to Eminem yet.

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