NHL: The Two Tirds report

Hey motherpuckers, we are back! The NHL All-Star game has come and gone, and each team’s odd seven-to-ten-day break is over. This is the time of the season when the NBA catches up to the NHL in terms of games played. It’s not weird, it’s just a matter of activity. Basketball has a lot of running, but the uniforms don’t carry weight. An NHL player is loaded with game armor, plus skating takes more effort than running, therefore they have more time between games. NHL season starts earlier, but the NBA always catches up.

Now that your February sports lesson is over, let’s take a look at where the NHL stands at their two-tirds mark in the season. Finally, my yard marker team, the Colorado Avalanche and you know well by now, has reached game 55, posting a magnificent shut-out 3-0 win against the Senators… then losing to the Capitals last night – FUUDDGE.. Where does that leave them in the standings? No, no, no my skate-loving friends, we check out the Eastern conference first.

Eastern Conference

Shall we take a look at who won’t make the playoffs first? Let’s do that. As predicted at the halfway point, the Detroit Red Wings are not disappointing me in their failure to do anything this season. They’re fortunate they can remember how to lace up skates, let alone play hockey. The others? We have the New Jersey Devils, who used to be the Colorado Rockies… and may as well have been the baseball Colorado Rockies the way they’re playing… and the aforementioned Ottawa Senators… who the Colorado Avalanche just shut out. To complete this trifecta of tenuous relationships between the bottom three and the Avalanche, let’s harken back to when the Dead Wings were good and the Avalanche cared enough to hate them. Sit back, have a Stroh’s or a Coors, and enjoy this clip. If the link doesn’t work, just type in ‘Patrick Roy vs Mike Vernon” and that’ll get you there. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G7LZbJhi6Fo

Oh and BTW, we are going to add one more team. I believe it is time to knock on the arena door of the Buffalo Sabres and let them know the climb to get into the playoffs is too steep for them at this point so forget about it. They’ve sunk like a rock since the halfway point, going from the 8th spot down to 13th. Zoinks, Scoob! As for the rest…

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XFL Roughneck Report: Houston Roughnecks take the Los Angeles Wildcats by the Nape

XFL Roughneck Report: Houston Roughnecks take the Los Angeles Wildcats by the Nape

Before we get into taking a look at what happened Saturday for game 1, let’s just have an introduction – call it a post-first game introduction – to these Houston Roughnecks. Starting with the logo – a logo looking suspiciously like the old Houston Oilers logo so my assumption is the same “designer” who created this also created Trump’s Space Force logo… or is that Space Farce, I forget. Let’s start with…

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The XFL Has A WWE Problem

The XFL Has A WWE Problem

By most accounts, the XFL had a successful opening weekend. Ratings were decent, the football itself was better than expected, and the league has drawn more early buzz than last year’s failed league, the AAF. The XFL announced that they had sold more season tickets in the week lead up to the season than the AAF sold in the entirety of its existence. High end sports personalities on Twitter such as Mina Kimes and Robert Mays were actively talking about it all weekend.

There were a lot of fun things also involved. They had the coaches mic’ed up and occasionally let us viewers listen in on plays they were calling before they happened. The league also let viewers into the replay room and mic’ed up both the referee and the replay official, giving viewers an amazing amount of access into the thought process that goes into a potential play review. I could go on all day about the different rules that have made the game more fast paced, and before the week is over, I probably will.

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I give you Props: Proposition bets for LIV

Hey kids, as you may well know – or not depending upon your life I guess – Super Bowl LIV is this Sunday. Who’s playing? It’s the Chiefs and the 49ers, but really who cares? This isn’t about who wins, but who makes money.

No, I’m not going to go on and on about which square to pick on the party or office grid to win sweet cash each quarter that eventually gets claimed victory by Francine the receptionist who generally hopes the team whose quarterback has the better-looking ass wins.

However, ladies and gents, that winner could be you using a different form of betting. And if you have the propensity to gamble your life away, why not do it watching a game rather than sitting at a roulette table quietly praying to your desired Lord to make that ball hit 22 Black? WARNING: No bet is a surefire thing (they are about as surefire a thing as a long-lasting marriage), but there are some Super Bowl bets you may want to make to try and expand your pocketbook.

How does one make some coin you may ask? With a proposition bet. A proposition bet, short form prop bet, is one where a person such as yourself puts some money down on an occurrence… or non-occurrence… happening during any game, but especially the Super Bowl.

There are more than 400 prop bets you can make. Heck no I am not going to go over all of them, but let’s check out a few that aren’t the typical “Will so-and-so score a touchdown in the first half” kind of prop bets.

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Fancy Boys founder Matt Drufke doesn’t know anything about football. Lucky for him, Brandon Andreasen and Jack Baker do.

Each week, Matt emails Brandon and Jack NFL questions, they then immediately go and make fun of his lack of knowledge in a secret group chat. They then go and answer the questions. Here are those answers.

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Kobe Bryant 1978-2020

Kobe Bryant 1978-2020

In the world we live in nowadays, every death, and especially a celebrity death, requires an immediate audit of a person’s life. Everything has to be dissected, good and bad. In the coming days, a lot of people are going to write think pieces about what they consider the tainted legacy of Kobe Bryant. It never feels like we talk about the great things someone did, but rather dissect the more salacious moments of someone’s life.

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2020 WWE Royal Rumble Primer

2020 WWE Royal Rumble Primer

Royal Rumble is many wrestling fans favorite event of the season. For all of the pomp and circumstance of WrestleMania, the ever growing Summerslam, and the fading star that is Surivior Series, Royal Rumble provides joy for wrestling fans because it gives them the ability to see so many of their favorite stars, allows for surprise comebacks, and operates under a very simple premise: throw your opponent over the top rope. If their feet hit the ground, they are out. If you win, you get a championship match at WrestleMania.

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