In 2020, Netflix expanded quite a bit on its reality/unscripted/competition TV original series, with the first hit series The Circle–a social media competition featuring people trapped in apartments talking to each other on a fake social media platform. Very quickly, the streaming giant then pumped out Love is Blind and Too Hot to Handle, two relationship shows that could not be more different from each other. During this time, it was the COVID-19 pandemic, so we were all stuck in doors and glued to whatever was on TV. And I sat down and watched it all. Then, one day, I realized something about Love is Blind: the stars of these shows aren’t the people, they’re the weird metallic glasses everyone drinks from.
Please, stay with me. We’re about to go on a journey together revolving around reality TV drinkware. Yes, I’m aware this is bizarre.
Continue reading “Why Are Love Is Blind And Other Netflix Shows Using Those Stupid, Metallic Glasses? (An Expose)” →
The idea started, as all great ideas do, while listening to Saliva.
I was driving down an Arizona highway about a couple weeks ago when Click, Click, Boom by Saliva came on a local radio station. My wife, horrified by the song, told me to turn it off. I said I couldn’t turn it off, because the truth is, I goddamn love Saliva. Or, at least, I did love Saliva. It is one of those bands that everyone has in their life. You forget they exist. Then you randomly hear their song and it takes you back to a time in your life that the song was a soundtrack for.
We then got to talking about the most transformative times in our lives for music. The music that left an indelible mark on us. What was the era that helped form our musical taste, social standing, and style? As we sit in our mid 30’s, closer to the grave than we care to see fit, we look back more wistfully on the times when life didn’t feel like it was crushing us into sand. When the possibilities of the future were endless, and not filled with veterinarian bills and increasingly hostile emails from Blue Apron in your inbox.
Continue reading “Fancy Boys Club March Music Madness 2023” →
Hogwarts Legacy, one of the most anticipated video game releases of the year, came out a few days ago. The game, in which a player controls a child wizard at the school of magic made popular by the Harry Potter book and film series, is bound to sell a whole lot of units, though I won’t be one of them. For starters, I don’t own a video game console unless you include my phone, of which there are several games I often pass time with. Also, I think there have only been a few great video games, and the last one may have been Halo. There is no better video game, to me, than Burger Time. That being said, I understand that this boy wizard franchise, created by J.K. Rowling, meant a whole heck of a lot to a whole bunch of people and that sentimentality is going to be huge for sales.
Even if it means that people are supporting something that’s really gross.
Yeah… it’s one of these pieces.
Continue reading “For heavens sake, you don’t have to play the fucking wizard game!” →
For the past three years, my wife, Moon Daisy, and I have spent our time traveling in a dilapidated seafoam green 1971 Volkswagen Bus. The interior was a faded checkerboarded material that looked like cloth but felt like a damp sponge that sat in a dirty sink over the weekend. The van smelled of sex, caviar, and Drakkar Noir’s most nefarious scent, “Voyeur Connoisseur.” Throughout my years as a prolific mountain climber, award-winning hiker, and tantric sex thought leader, I have had many luxuries. I’ve dined in the finest restaurants in Hanoi. Slept on 1,000 count Egyptian sheets in Sudan. I’ve celebrated the new year with world leaders and billionaires in Club 33 in Disneyland. But one experience that separates “me” from “you” is trying to make ends meet and traveling throughout America in a piece of shit automobile for “fun.”
Continue reading “Can You Call It A Bed & Breakfast If There Isn’t A BDSM Dungeon?” →
Chicago is mourning the loss of longtime radio personality Lin Brehmer, who died this morning of cancer. Since 1984, Brehmer worked at WXRT, with only a one-year absence when he temporarily went to Minnesota in 1990. Since 1991, he has been WXRT’s morning personality, calling himself “Your best friend in the whole world” and incorporating a lyric from a Frank Zappa lyric as his catch phrase: “It’s great to be alive.” Brehmer died of prostate cancer at the age of 68.
Our Rick Copper and Matt Drufke give their thoughts about the Chicago legend.
Continue reading “I’m Coming Home, Via Chicago- Remembering Lin Brehmer (1954-2023)” →
This past week, if you are a fan of hatred and being a gross piece of shit, then the GOP was just giving you all you could handle and then some. This is the kind of stuff that always makes me roll my eyes, but especially when you consider this: when people talk about the crazy ideas that the “radical left” has, it’s always things like socialized medicine, a fair tax system, working to make sure we don’t destroy the earth, a fair living wage, and removing student debt. You know, things only real pieces of shit would want. Oh, and also, it would be great if police stopped murdering unarmed minorities.
What are some of the crazy ideas of the “far right”? I don’t know, because it’s the same ideas as the mainstream conservative movement.
Let’s dive in:
Continue reading “Thanksgiving 2022: The week that was conservative bigotry” →
If you watched the VMA awards (I did not), you saw one of the two major stories which came out of the evening. One was the first appearance of Johnny Depp post-defamation trial, so… y’know… gross. The other was the announcement that there would be a new Taylor Swift album, and that is always a big deal.
Continue reading “What my hopes are for the new Taylor Swift album…” →
(EDITOR’S NOTE: This review will be spoiler free. If it ain’t in the trailer, it ain’t here.)
Thor: Love And Thunder, the fourth titular film with the God Of Thunder and director Taika Waititi’s second effort in the franchise, has opened to lower Rotten Tomatoes score yet higher box office totals than it’s immediate predecessor, the excellent Thor: Ragnarok. If the critical consensus is that Love And Thunder is trying too hard to recapture the formula and magic from Ragnarok, the movie-going audiences have responded with a hearty, “We do not care. We just want to give money to the MCU.”
And it is clear that Love And Thunder has a lot of effort and flare and jokes. Waititi and star (and co-producer Chris Hemsworth) clearly felt the pressure to make this film a bigger spectacle. Because of that, you see a lot more storylines and punchlines and yelling sheep. But how does it all come together as a final product?
Ok, I guess… and that’s kind of the problem.
Continue reading “Fancy Boys Go To The Movies: Thor: Love And Thunder” →
Wednesday, news was made when pro-choice activists staked out a Morton’s Steakhouse where Supreme Court Justice Brett Kavanaugh was eating. According to reports, these protestors called the restaurant and demanded Kavanaugh be kicked out and were yelling so fiercely that the justice had to leave out the back. The restaurant chain called the yelling by the activists, “an act of selfishness and void of deceny”, and if they think that’s bad, they should see some of the bullshit this dickhead Kavanaugh has been doing from the bench!
A lot of the same conservatives who are condemning what happened Wednesday are the same people who also have the dumbest arguments against a woman’s right to choose her own reproductive care. So when they tell us that we shouldn’t be ok with what happened outside this Morton’s all I can think to respond is, “You were the ones who wrote the playbook.”
Continue reading “The Best Understanding of Why You Should Yell at a Douchebag at a Steakhouse…” →
With Thor: Love And Thunder preparing to hit theaters and dominate the box office this weekend, I thought I would take a moment a look back at the MCU. Because you cannot deny the overwhelming effect that Marvel has had on the movie industry, and it’s not always good.
Continue reading “The Absolutely Official (and CORRECT!) MCU Rankings!” →