Fucking fuck goddamn it fucking fuck it all to goddamn fucking hell.
We don’t know.
We’re just really sad.
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The world gets better
There is no way to understate this: Life, as we know it, is going to get better in a few weeks.Continue reading “Countdown To Hope And Joy And Also Chris Rock”
Everything that exists this year has a “Oh, this is 2020” moment, and Sunday night’s VMAs were no exception. I just didn’t expect it to happen in the first four minutes of the broadcastContinue reading “The MTV VMAs: The Most Important Unimportant Event”
Before there was Fancy Boys, there was another site I was writing for. I remember that I first started by doing insanely in-depth Oscar coverage (much like I did here in January) and the site founder asked me if Black Panther had deserved to be nominated for Best Picture. I made it clear that not only did the Marvel film deserve to be nominated, but that out of all the nominated films in 2018, it deserved to win. It was my #3 film of that year and was grounded by the amazing performance of it’s lead, the King of Wakanda, Chadwick Boseman.
Boseman died today at the age of 43 after battling Stage III colon cancer for four years. With his passing, the world has lost one of the best working actors in film today. We also lost a man who played so many amazing heroes… and heroes are something the world desperately needs right now.Continue reading “A Hero For Our Time: Remembering Chadwick Boseman”
With HBO Max, your pop culture viewing options are a plentiful harvest. You can catch up on movies you’ve never seen before. You can watch all of The Sopranosand try and figure out what gabagool is. You can start to binge all of the Studio Ghibli movies and then get angry when your wife watches Spirited Away with you and doesn’t “understand what the big deal is.”
Continue reading “So No One Told You Life Was Gonna Be This Way: Unearthing The Lost Episodes Of Friends”
Or you can just watch a buttload of Friends.
It seems like the 2020 election would be the perfect time to shake things up.
For the GOP, there are a vocal and noticeable group of voters looking to separate themselves from President Trump and his policies and rhetoric and stupid face. For the DNC, there is an overwhelming wave of apathy for the Biden/Harris ticket on social media which leaves one to believe that this will be the 800th election in a row where the youth vote chooses to “sit it out”.
This is the perfect time to look third party; someone who can come and unite the disenfranchised and bring people together. Someone who can say, “The two party system has not had your best interest at heart for decades, possibly centuries!” Someone who can bring real change to a nation in dire need of exactly that. And there’s no better party to do so than the Libertarian Party, a political organization which seems to be the right group and the right time.
However, the Libertarian Party has given us Jo Fucking Jorgensen, which means it’s gonna be another election where almost no one is happy.
Don’t worry, though. I can fix everything.Continue reading “Give Me A Libertarian… Wait, No. Give Me Death.”
When news broke this week that Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson was going to be buying the XFL, I got excited. Not because I like, or even care, about that ridiculous league. Our site has spent way too much time and way too much talent talking about the second coming of the WWE’s failed attempt to break into the football business. No, my friends. I’m all on pins and needles because we finally get a chance to talk about Dwayne Johnson, the actor.
There is no doubt that The Rock is the most successful actor to come from wrestling and you could make the case that he has had the most successful post-wrestling career of all time. Sure, Jesse Ventura became governor, but that’s Minnesota, where there are more lakes than people. Johnson could become president. Hell, The Rock could be a pope if he wanted to.
But that’s not what I care about.Continue reading “Rank The Rock: A Look At The Films Of Dwayne Johnson”
Sitting in her log cabin and throwing another log on the fire (although it’s June), a quarantined Taylor Swift looks out her window and sees, chiseled in stone, the all too famous monument which is the Mount Rushmore of current pop music. Swift sees her own face, and why wouldn’t she? She smiles as she thinks about all of her amazing accomplishments. Sure, her fans would say she may not have as many Grammys as she should, but the proof is in the proverbial pudding: Taylor Swift sells records.
As she looks at the other faces carved into rock, Swift cannot help but think of her relationship with every member on the mount. Next to her is Beyoncé, the undeniable queen of this century. Yet, the relationship between Taylor and the true Child of Destiny has never been contentious; truly, game has recognized game. To Beyoncé’s right is Drake, a person who has had a similar career arc to Swift. Each dominated their original genre until pop music had no choice but to give them the respect they deserved. Next to Drake is an interesting situation, as construction crews are fervently dynamiting Kanye West’s face off this hallowed monument.
Taylor allows herself a brief smile before turning away from her window, heading to her music room where her piano and guitar sat, and began to get to work.
From these sessions, folklore was born.Continue reading “Ghost In The Machine: a review of Taylor Swift’s “folklore””
It was a lazy July evening, one not without the typical musings and trappings of summers gone by. The fireflies were gesticulating their way to an early grave. The yearly rite of this year’s asphalt patches melting, then oozing down gravity’s rainbow. I had received a letter from a reader who wished to remain anonymous. She then slipped up and signed Agnes Cartwright at the bottom. The letter contained a vision she had been blessed with earlier in the week, shortly after elderly and compromised immunity shopping hours. The lady Cartwright believed she had seen star of stage and screen Greg Kinnear shopping for groceries. Central Indiana’s favorite investigative reporter was on the case.Continue reading “EYE ON PLAINFIELD: GREG KINNEAR SPOTTED AT KROGER”
I don’t know how young the readership is for our site. Sometimes I slip into a realm of understanding that everyone alive has experienced the things that I have, and I could not be further from fact. Around the turn of the century, the late Regis Philbin was the hostof Who Wants To Be A Millionaire?, a quiz show that was such a phenomenon that it seemed to permeate everyday life. In the year of our lord 1999, the only thing bigger than Millionaire was the impending apocalypse when the new year arrived. The reason the show was the cultural touchstone that it became was because of the stakes, the production of the show, and most of all, its charismatic host. We lost Regis, a true icon of Millennial adolescence, on Saturday at the age of 88.Continue reading “Gleeful Gravitas: Regis Philbin and the Last Great Game Show”