Brandon Andreasen

Misc.

My Grandpa, The Hero

February 14, 2020February 13, 2020by Brandon Andreasen1 Comment

On this day 65 years ago, Time Magazine, one of the biggest magazines in the country at the time, released their latest issue. Carl Jung, the noted Swiss Psychiatrist, was on the cover. Deep inside the issue is a small article titled “Aviation: For Distinguished Flying.” It was about a United Airlines flight from the month prior that had mechanical issues and crashed into a cornfield in Iowa. Every person from the crash managed to walk away without injury. The pilot of that flight was my grandfather.

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Sports

The XFL Has A WWE Problem

February 11, 2020February 10, 2020by Brandon AndreasenLeave a Comment

By most accounts, the XFL had a successful opening weekend. Ratings were decent, the football itself was better than expected, and the league has drawn more early buzz than last year’s failed league, the AAF. The XFL announced that they had sold more season tickets in the week lead up to the season than the AAF sold in the entirety of its existence. High end sports personalities on Twitter such as Mina Kimes and Robert Mays were actively talking about it all weekend.

There were a lot of fun things also involved. They had the coaches mic’ed up and occasionally let us viewers listen in on plays they were calling before they happened. The league also let viewers into the replay room and mic’ed up both the referee and the replay official, giving viewers an amazing amount of access into the thought process that goes into a potential play review. I could go on all day about the different rules that have made the game more fast paced, and before the week is over, I probably will.

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Sports

Kobe Bryant 1978-2020

January 26, 2020January 27, 2020by Brandon AndreasenLeave a Comment

In the world we live in nowadays, every death, and especially a celebrity death, requires an immediate audit of a person’s life. Everything has to be dissected, good and bad. In the coming days, a lot of people are going to write think pieces about what they consider the tainted legacy of Kobe Bryant. It never feels like we talk about the great things someone did, but rather dissect the more salacious moments of someone’s life.

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Sports

2020 WWE Royal Rumble Primer

January 24, 2020January 24, 2020by Brandon AndreasenLeave a Comment

Royal Rumble is many wrestling fans favorite event of the season. For all of the pomp and circumstance of WrestleMania, the ever growing Summerslam, and the fading star that is Surivior Series, Royal Rumble provides joy for wrestling fans because it gives them the ability to see so many of their favorite stars, allows for surprise comebacks, and operates under a very simple premise: throw your opponent over the top rope. If their feet hit the ground, they are out. If you win, you get a championship match at WrestleMania.

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Comedy, Misc.

The Angry Old White Man's Guide to the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame 2020

January 15, 2020by Brandon AndreasenLeave a Comment

Hey Fuckers! It’s me, an angry white guy. I like to let the world know at all times what i’m mad about. I’m the reason you hate going on Facebook. My 18 Twitter followers know at all times what i’m pissed off about. The world is changing and i’m not emotionally equipped to handle it! You know what was great? 1988. It should stay 1988 forever. Man, 1988 rocked.

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Comedy, Pop Culture

A Royal Mess

January 14, 2020January 14, 2020by Brandon AndreasenLeave a Comment

If you live a life of ignorance that can only be described as blissful, you might have missed the announcement. If you, like myself and millions of others who, like two trees growing into eachother over time cause the trees to become one, have your phone semi-permanently attached to your hand so that you can be hyper aware of the latest things happening in pop culture, have surely heard the news last week that Prince Harry and his wife Megan Markle have decided to split away from the Royal Family of England to create a life for themselves.

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Uncategorized

The Astros Fought the Law and the Law Won

January 13, 2020by Brandon AndreasenLeave a Comment

Baseball was the last pure game. Unchanged by time. Still played by nine men under the summer sun, fans in the stands, burying their real lives in sport and beer. Children played the game on the streets until the street lights illumination dictated the universal calling card to come home for dinner. Yea, this is a long ago ideal that has had its nostalgia sugar coated to a diabetes induced level. The fact is, baseball has always harbored cheating for the sake of victory above all else. Ty Cobb, one of the greatest players ever, sharpened his spikes so he could injure opposing players who made the mistake of being near him when he slid. Hank Aaron and Willie Mays admitted to using “greenies” for energy. “Greenies” were actually a version of methamphetamine. Steroids became chic in the late 90’s revival of the game.

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