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The Reasons Why Donald Trump May Announce His 2024 Presidential Campaign Shortly (and the one reason that is absolutely not true)

July 3, 2022by Matt Drufke1 Comment

If you are to believe Alex Jones and Roger Stone, Donald Trump will be using the Independence Day holiday as the way to kick off his 2024 run for office of President Of The United States of America, a job he recently held until Joe Biden absolutely decimated him in the 2020 election. Now, short of mental illness, I’m not sure why anyone would trust anything Jones or Stone says, but I do think their prediction has a chance of coming true.

Let’s talk about why.

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Comedy, politics, Pop Culture

The Truth About Elon Musk And Twitter: A Fancy Boys Exclusive

April 26, 2022by Matt DrufkeLeave a Comment

When news broke yesterday that billionaire weirdo Elon Musk had purchased Twitter, the social media site became abuzz with theories. Is this simply a way for Musk to add to his pile of expensive toys? Or was this a way for Musk to allow people like Donald Trump to rejoin the platform (which might be the only way for him to, legitimately, win back the presidency in 2024)?

The truth is much more weird, as the truth usually is.

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Advice, Misc., politics, Pop Culture

Parler Games

November 11, 2020by Matt DrufkeLeave a Comment

On Saturday, I said that there was no worse group of people on Facebook than the people who said that COVID would somehow mysteriously disappear the day after the election (fun fact: it has not). Well, it looks like there is a new group out there and they’re giving the COVID dickheads a real run for their money.

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Advice, Comedy, Misc.

The Official Hierarchy Of Social Media Birthday Wishes

May 20, 2020May 20, 2020by Matt DrufkeLeave a Comment

They say that there are only two guarantees in life: death and taxes. I think they’re wrong.

Let’s start with the taxes part. Sure, we all pay our taxes. Except we all don’t. The rich have clever ways of getting around that and I’m pretty sure this is why our current president doesn’t want to show any of his returns. So, I’m going to replace taxes with social media, because I have friends on all the social medium who do not pay their taxes.

And death? I mean, yeah… but, man, that’s morose. Let’s flip that around and instead of death, let’s call it life. Doesn’t that feel more positive?

So, now there are only two guarantees in life: life and social media. And in the middle of those come online birthday greetings. But what’s the right one for you to send to someone?

Let’s get into it.

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Sports

You All Need To Get On The NBA Twitter Feed Right Damn Now!!!

December 29, 2019by Matt DrufkeLeave a Comment

I am not normally one to freak out and post Buzzfeed-esque articles. If you like my writing, it means you like excessive prose. After all, why use 200 words when you can use 2,500, many of which incorrectly?

But the NBA twitter account is on fucking fire right now, and I needed you to know that right now.

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