Derek Chauvin: Convicted Murderer

Derek Chauvin: Convicted Murderer

A short while ago, justice was served.

Derek Chauvin, the police officer who, on video, murdered George Floyd was convicted of all the counts he was charged with- second-degree unintentional murder, third-degree murder and second-degree manslaughter. His bail was revoked and he was taken away in handcuffs, remanded into custody.

I am currently overwhelmed with feelings and emotions and would just like to share a few of them.

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Tucker Carlson, Sydney Powell and Why Republicans Lie So Fucking Much

Tucker Carlson, Sydney Powell and Why Republicans Lie So Fucking Much

I cannot imagine it feels good to be called a liar whom no one should take seriously. I assume it would feel even worse if the person saying that about you is supposed to be an ally you trust. However, I have no idea what if feels like to have a person whom you trust say that about you because they’re using it as a legal defense… but I can’t imagine you’re feeling great, even if you’re the Kraken.

This is exactly what is happening in the defamation lawsuit right now that Dominion Voting Systems, Inc. has brought against Sydney “The Kraken” Powell for $1.3 billion (yes, with a “b”). Dominion is suing other people including former Trump attorney (and Razzie nominee) Rudy Giuliani and the guy who owns MyPillow, whose name I do not care enough to find out so I will just call him Mike Pillow.

I find these lawsuits fascinating, but there are three things that I am absolutely floored by as I’ve been following this story and thinking about how it relates to the state of modern conservative politics. The first is watching a lawyer argue that not only is their client a liar, but that everyone knows their client is a liar and no person who isn’t a fucking idiot should know not to take anything they say as a fact. The second is that Tucker Carlson, arguably the most viewed voice in conservative media, also used the same defense a few years ago. But it’s the third thing that’s maybe the most frightening to me, and should be the most terrifying to all of us:

Legally, this defense works.

Welcome to modern conservative politics.

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The Other Things Greg Abbott Ordered That The MSM Don’t Want You To Know About

The Other Things Greg Abbott Ordered That The MSM Don’t Want You To Know About

Earlier today, Texas governor Greg Abbott made news when he announced that he would be lifting all COVID restrictions in place, including the statewide mask mandate he put into effect in July. Starting March 10, Governor Abbott is not just removing the mask mandate, but also the limit on the amount of patrons who can be in a restaurant, despite the fact that Texas has seen an uptick in new COVID cases (and COVID deaths) over the last two weeks. Texas becomes the largest state to join a list of other states to lift mask mandates and COVID restrictions.

But what the liberal media doesn’t want you to know is this: there’s so much more that Abbott is allowing. Let’s give it up for freedom.

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Cancer Gets One Right: RIP Rush Limbaugh

Cancer Gets One Right: RIP Rush Limbaugh

In a hilarious turn of events this morning, gluttonous bag of carbon and evil Rush Limbaugh succumbed to lung cancer. His death comes as a culmination of decades of hateful rhetoric and divisive speech that helped to poison the minds of generations, dividing families and our nation as a whole. His advocacy for family values such as intolerance and prejudice were a hallmark of his tenure in the American broadcast community. His affection for overt racism, spousal rape, and the disenfranchisement of LGBTQ Americans were the pillars on which Limbaugh stood. He was an architect of the partisan political landscape that has permeated every molecule of our lives, taking the dissolution of the Fairness Doctrine by the Reagan Administration and nurturing it to its full potential. He leaves a world worse than what he found. His legacy is that of divisiveness, impudence, and the echoes of collateral consternation among those still walking the earth.

Now on his great eternal journey, may he be shown the same kindness and consideration he granted upon the least of those during his seventy hate-fueled years.

He will be mourned only by those who wish his vitriolic views into fruition.

He will not be missed.

Friday Five: Special 2020 Wrap-Up Edition!

Friday Five: Special 2020 Wrap-Up Edition!

2020 was, to put it mildly, a weird year.

COVID affected every aspect of our lives, including the art we consumed and, perhaps more importantly, how we consume it. We couldn’t go to the movie theater. Many artists we releasing their “quarantine albums”. Most shows and movies had to stop production for some period of time. Sports went away and then came back under weird conditions.

But that doesn’t mean it wasn’t a great year for the arts. It was just… different.

Because of this, we scrapped our plans to write the “Best Of” articles that usually appear in magazines and websites. We’re bringing back the Friday Five. We asked our writers and guest contributors to list their five favorite pieces of consumed media from the last year.

Here is what The Fancy Boys loved about 2020.

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President-Sponsored Terrorism

President-Sponsored Terrorism

About two hours ago, I turned on the television to watch the counting of the electoral votes. I knew that some senators and congressmen were going to be making a big fracas about stuff, and I knew that people were going to be protesting somewhere in Washington. If I’m being honest, I didn’t know what to expect.

I know that I didn’t expect this.

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Winners & Losers: 2020 Election

Winners & Losers: 2020 Election

Our long national nightmare is over. Our new national nightmare is just beginning. It’s election season baby! A time for our corporate overlords to chart our new direction forward, not backward. Upward, not downward. And twirling, always twirling towards freedom. Let’s break down the winners and losers of the 2020 election.

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