Every year, one song defines the season as a landmark in American culture. It may have no relevance to current events, in fact, it would be better if it didn’t. 2019 just took a DNA test, and turns out “Truth Hurts” is 100% the Song of the Summer.
Continue reading “It Is Time To Declare the 2019 Song of the Summer”Brexit, Baby! It’s more than just a topic you half listen to on “Last Week Tonight with John Oliver.” It’s a full on thing, and it’s exciting as all hell. It’s basically what would happen if government was run by Chuck Lorre. There are low end burns, family members turning on each other, and horrible haired men flailing about, trying to impose his will on a country that regrets a vote in the first place. You know what, fuck Chuck Lorre. Brexit has turned the United Kingdom into a stupider (somehow) version of the United States.
England is run much like the United States. Only instead of pretending like they are all god fearing people to get simpletons to vote for them, in England they all act as if they fear a 94 year old queen who occasionally likes drinking champagne. You know what, i’m getting ahead of myself and already treading into dangerous territory of making this very boring.
Let’s try this another way. Let’s Fancy Boy it. No, no. Let’s Gawker(RIP) it! No. No. There is only one way to properly explain it, and that’s the Toby Keith way. Here is: The ‘Murica Guide to Brexit.
Continue reading “The ‘Murica Guide to Brexit”I am a fan of the Premier League Football team Tottenham Hotspur. However, I am not necessarily a zealous fan of football/futbol/soccer for one particular reason – the clock. Fine, I can handle players falling like bowling pins every time they feel a breeze go by from an opposing player. I can handle them laying on the pitch for five minutes writhing in pain grabbing whatever body part they felt was injured… and then getting up and playing some more.
OK, I can barely handle that. That’s dumb. Drag them off the field and get on with it.
What vexes me as much as Wisconsin drivers using the left lane like it’s their Sunday drive is clock management… or lack of clock management. Time was created by man, so let’s use it, shall we? When a player is egregiously fouled by an opposing player by something as awful as a tap on the shoulder and falls into a fetal position onto the field as if someone took their blankie? The clock keeps ticking time off the regulation 45 minute half. Doesn’t seem fair right?
I write this on Mondays. The Bears game is on in an hour. Let’s get to the damn rankings!
Continue reading “FBC NFL Power Rankings Week 4”
Fancy Boys founder Matt Drufke doesn’t know anything about football. Lucky for him, Brandon Andreasen and Jack Baker do.
Each week, Matt emails Brandon and Jack NFL questions, they then immediately go and make fun of his lack of knowledge in a secret group chat. They then go and answer the questions. Here are those answers.
Continue reading “Fancy Boys Football Week 3 NFL Mailbag”
Week 3 is in the books, and I’m here with the only recap you need. Here’s the Winners & Losers of Week 3 of the NFL season.
Continue reading “NFL Week 3 Winners & Losers”
I grew up in the South suburbs of Chicago. I was raised by a single mom who got pregnant at 18 and who herself came from a broken home. We lived very modestly, constantly moving from one apartment to another sharing places with various roommates. However, the one thing my mom recognized early on was that I possessed many talents and she went out of her way to spend whatever she had to make sure that I had an excellent education in the arts. Piano lessons, acting lessons, singing in choirs and more guitar lessons.
At one point, she even had to borrow money in order for me to get my own saxophone just to participate in the elementary school band. Saying my mother was “supportive” of my dreams of being a rock star would be an understatement. Naturally, this desire followed me throughout my life and as soon as I graduated from High School (and by graduated I mean, got my GED before my senior year was even finished), I packed my car and drove down to Nashville TN to become a famous songwriter. I was offered a “development deal” with a record label and thought this is it I’m on my way.
In less than 3 months, I was dropped from the label and had to come back to Chicago feeling like a failure. It was very clear that I didn’t understand “the business”.
Continue reading “Creating Laughter is the Best Medicine”Welcome to the Friday Five, the brain child of Fancy Boys Club creator Brandon Andreasen. Each week, we will give four questions and a top five list for all the Fancy Boys contributors to tell stories and give horrible top five lists for.
This week, with the Emmys happening this Sunday, we’re focusing on the small screen. We asked our writers all kinds of questions about television. Here’s what we asked and what they answered.
Continue reading “Friday Five: September 20th Edition”
With fall in full swing, we’re headed into the last quarter of this year… and this decade. This is the last chance for studios to get their films out to have them get Oscar consideration and to make the lists of all the critics whom they undoubtedly hate. What are the films I’m most looking forward to? Let’s count them down:
Continue reading “The Most Anticipated Films Left In 2019…”
If you were to imagine the worst possible place and time to perform stand-up comedy, I assume that place would be Milwaukee, Wisconsin and that time would be during a Packers/Vikings playoff game.
That is exactly where I found myself on January 5, 2013, performing at the Northern Lights Theater at the Potawatami Hotel & Casino–on a stage that has hosted such memorable acts as Ringo Starr, Don Rickles, Willie Nelson and B.B. King–in front of an audience of 12 people.
Continue reading “My Worst Time Onstage”
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