Tag: Chicago Bears

NFL, Sports

Fancy Boys Club Presents This Week In Football: Week Three

by Brandon AndreasenLeave a Comment on Fancy Boys Club Presents This Week In Football: Week Three
Fancy Boys Club Presents This Week In Football: Week Three

Every week during the NFL season, FBC co-founder Brandon Andreasen takes a look at the NFL and makes fun of a bunch of teams and players and bets to make him feel  better about the fact that he roots for the Chicago Bears and is such a degenerate gambler, he is probably betting on Korean Table Tennis at this very moment.

The Pregame Show

I’ve officially outgrown my ability to play in a dozen fantasy football leagues every season. Not outgrown as in size, though i’m quite rotund. Just outgrown in terms of life responsibilities. This actually goes for my gambling prowess, as well. I remember last year I was so hot betting on football, I felt like i’d been shot out of a cannon. I hit some massive early season bets that carried me throughout the season. This year, though? I feel like a fat toddler hopelessly throwing ping pong balls at gold fish bowls at some third rate carnival that smells like Burning Man.

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NFL, Sports

Who Will Be The Next Chicago Bears Coach?

by Brandon AndreasenLeave a Comment on Who Will Be The Next Chicago Bears Coach?
Who Will Be The Next Chicago Bears Coach?

After another disappointing season in 2023, the Chicago Bears have fired head coach Matt Eberflus.

After disasterous play calling at the end of the Washington Commanders game, the Bears have fired Matt Eberflus in an unprecedented move, with the team still at 4-3 and very much in contention in the NFC.

After a second no-show act by his team in an unquestionably embarrassing loss to the New England Patriots, the Bears have relieved Matt Eberflus of his duties as head coach.

Bad end of game play calling and an opposing special teams purportedly knowing exactly what needed to be done to block a kick has finally undone Matt Eberflus as Bears coach.

Oh, now you are gonna do it? All it took was an open rebellion by the defense after one of the most obvious and mystifying time management mistakes in NFL history, that of which’s history books have already been rewritten at least twice this season by the very same coach has caused Matt Eberflus to get fired so he can spend more time with his bees?

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NFL, Sports

A Chicago Bears Choose Your Own Adventure

by Brandon AndreasenLeave a Comment on A Chicago Bears Choose Your Own Adventure

It’s impressive sometimes how quickly you can go from “what are you doing?” to “what, you are doing it!” The Chicago Bears stepped into free agency with the third most available cap space in the NFL, and up until 9:30 PM on Thursday, the results were….underwhelming? Just okay? Good for depth? For the most part, the signings up this point have been moves a team that believes it is close to a championship make. Depth moves in the middle to bottom of the roster. Building strong special teams. Overpaying for a running back they didn’t need.

Generally, those are moves that teams make when they know they are close to a championship level and are safeguarding themselves up and down the roster against injury. Then the Bears traded for future Wide Receiver Keenan Allen. The Los Angeles Chargers came to Allen asking him to take a pay cut. He is due to make 18 million with a cap hit of 23 million in 2024, the final season of his contract. Allen said no. The Chargers proceeded to jettison him to the Bears for nothing more than a 4th round pick.

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NFL, Sports, Uncategorized

Who Is The Best Bears Wide Receiver Of Our Lifetime

by Brandon AndreasenLeave a Comment on Who Is The Best Bears Wide Receiver Of Our Lifetime
Who Is The Best Bears Wide Receiver Of Our Lifetime

The Bears are terrible. Odds are, if you are reading this, the Bears have been bad for most of your lifetime. With only brief respites of competency, any true Bears fan can point to a personal Mt. Rushmore of their least favorite member of this franchise. Alonzo Spellman. Todd Sauerbraun. Adam Shaheen. Shea McClellin. And that isn’t even to mention the absolute school bus fire that is the Bears quarterbacks. Moses Moreno, Steve Stenstrom, and David Fales come to mind, along with dozens of others.

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Comedy, Sports

On Being a Sports Fan

by copperwriteLeave a Comment on On Being a Sports Fan

If one were to ask me, I’d say I am a casual fan of many teams – if one were to define ‘casual’ as being one who has at least enough in their tool belt of fandom to whip out the right tool for the job for discussion. I cannot recite stats. I cannot pull team folklore and craziness out of my ass and relate it to some event in a personal manner.

Nor do I want to do it.

That sort of fandom to me is a tad excessive as well as obsessive and I can see why athletes get a little wary of those types – the adults who wear a guy’s jersey and then ask for an autograph. In fact, I will take it a step further – wearing anyone’s jersey seems a bit excessive. You’re not them, that’s not your name on the back. Why are you wearing someone else’s name on your back? Why are you spending so much time and effort following a team as if you are a part of the team? And why are you all dressing up like this clown?


Here’s a little advice Bears fans – don’t. Ditka never liked you. Ever.

WHY ARE YOU USING THE WORD ‘WE?’

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Sports

Sorry, Cole Kmet Was a Bad Pick, No Matter What ESPN Radio Says

by Brandon Andreasen1 Comment on Sorry, Cole Kmet Was a Bad Pick, No Matter What ESPN Radio Says
Sorry, Cole Kmet Was a Bad Pick, No Matter What ESPN Radio Says

I feel like i’ve got to start this article with a disclaimer: I genuinely hope Cole Kmet becomes a great football player and ends up as a quicker version of fellow former Notre Dame tight end Kyle Rudolph. In fact, the future of Ryan Pace as the General Manager for the Bears will be partially dependent on his ability to become a productive NFL player. This article isn’t about whether I believe that Cole Kmet can become a top tier NFL Tight End.

Coming into night two of the NFL draft, there was a common refrain among experts: This is the deepest second round in 25 years. The talent level ran deep at several important positions, notably wide receiver and safety. The Bears were standing at number 43 with their first pick in the draft, having lost their first round pick in exchange for Khalil Mack last season. Among the main needs at the pick were wide receiver and safety, along with offensive line help and cornerbacks. As the second round began to shake out, a dream scenario was being laid out for Chicago. Two of the best safeties in the draft, Grant Delpit and Antoine Winfield Jr. were both becoming available. Delpit won the Thorpe Award in 2019 given to college football’s best secondary player. Winfield Jr. is a hard hitting safety who thrives on trying to blow up the box and tackle the running back behind the line of scrimmage.

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Sports, Uncategorized

The MLB Playoffs… and Joe Maddon is not Mike Ditka

by copperwriteLeave a Comment on The MLB Playoffs… and Joe Maddon is not Mike Ditka

I’m going to sprint through the baseball playoffs and sprinkle some ‘Maddon Moments’ in to explain, in my mind, what happened to Maddon and the Cubs, while using Ditka like he used Bears fans.

By the time you read this, the wild card games – October 1 and October 2 – may be over, or at least started. It doesn’t really matter much. Those four teams can douse themselves in all the champagne they want, but it’s pretty much a cheap victory. Put it this way, it’s the same kind of victory you get when you visit your elderly grandmother at her assisted living facility and win their corn hole tournament.

But before we dig into the wild card teams, let’s just take a look at the 2016-2019 Cubs vs the 1984-1987 Bears. If you look at their timelines, they are a tad similar. And you can argue both Maddon and Ditka can only deal with the hands they are dealt. True. Think of this like Texas Holdem. Ditka was holding the king and queen of hearts and staring at the ten, jack and ace of hearts face up on the table… and threw out the king ‘aka’ Wilbur Marshall. Maddon’s hand, while good, was an ace and a ten. Still a potentially winning hand, but could have been better. Cubs management bet high on a good, but ultimately bad hand.

OK, now let’s place a hand on the wild card teams – The Rays, the A’s, the Brewers, the Nats.

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