Grappling with the most popular song of 2023 in 16 listens

Grappling with the most popular song of 2023 in 16 listens

It is rare that something that is culturally dominant somehow slips by me. However, apparently this was the summer of Morgan Wallen’s “Last Night”, and I didn’t even know. I’ve never even heard the song. I’m clearly in the minority.

Six days ago, “Last Night” was the #1 song on Billboard’s Hot 100 for the sixteenth week in a row. In doing so, it set the record for the longest running song at #1 for a non-collaboration in the 65-year history of the chart. If Wallen’s song can keep it’s streak going for number one, it will set the record for the longest time on top of this chart for all songs. And since the Hot 100 measures streaming, sales, and radio plays, to have this record would make the country tune, in my opinion, the most popular song of all time.

I would like to point out again that I have never heard this song. But that is about to change.

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Megan Rapinoe: American hero

Megan Rapinoe: American hero

A few days ago, I wrote about the hypocrisy of conservatives. I stand by every word I meant, but I also forgot one of the biggest contradictions. A conservative will claim to love America. In fact, that is what they will claim is the difference between the two parties: one side (theirs) loves America so much because it’s so star-spangled awesome, and one side (not theirs) doesn’t and is aggressively seeking it’s destruction.

And a member of the GOP will feel that way until they find something about America they don’t like. Then all bets are off as they root for failure. There’s no better example of this than what happened in women’s soccer this weekend.

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Nothing anyone says fucking matters anymore: A GOP guide to living…

Nothing anyone says fucking matters anymore: A GOP guide to living…

This week should have been momentous as Donald J. Trump, a man who somehow got voted president in 2016, was indicted. However, because it is Donald Trump, it’s completely and utterly mundane. Honestly, I’m not sure how many times he’s been indicted now. Three times? Six times? Who knows? All I know is that it happened and is probably going to happen again soon (if all things from Georgia seem like they’re going to happen) and will probably keep happening until the slimy fuck is in the ground.

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Hours past “Midnights”: a (very late) review of Taylor Swift’s newest album

Hours past “Midnights”: a (very late) review of Taylor Swift’s newest album

The day that Fancy Boys Club went live, Taylor Swift released Lover. Since then, I have reviewed every album she has released since then. Unlike Jordan Holmes. whose series known as “The Swiftening” was an aggressive evisceration of her entire catalog, I have been able to find positive highlights in all of the music from pop’s reigning queen. However, today, when thinking about the song “Cruel Summer”, finally released as a single, I slowly realized something: I had forgotten to review Midnights, Swift’s tenth studio album which came out nine months ago.

Whoopsidoodles.

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Elon Musk and his BDE (Big Divorce Energy)

Elon Musk and his BDE (Big Divorce Energy)

I’m not sure Elon Musk has had a good week since he bought Twitter, but this last seven days has been especially bad for him.

With sites like Bluesky and Mastodon off and running as well as what feels like Musk’s own sabotage, Twitter is no longer the cool social media app to be on. The platform, at its height, represented everything the internet could be: a great community filled with laugh and smart ideas and fun. Musk has gotten rid of those and added more nazis and things he wants you to pay for.

Then, with Threads (Mark Zuckerberg’s foray into mini-blogs) revealed a week ago, Musk watched as his site’s numbers cratered while users signed up in droves for what was called the Fediverse, which is sadly not a social media site all about Kevin Federline. Elon handled this in a manner that could only be called “predictable to Elon”, calling the Zuck a cuck and then returning to Twitter 8 hours later to challenge him to have their penises measured.

Look, I should dislike Musk. And I do. That turd bought a thing I liked and turned it into something I like dramatically less. But there’s also another feeling I cannot help but have when I look at his behavior. And that’s pity.

Because right now, Elon Musk has BDE. Big Divorce Energy.

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Monkeys (plural) in the Suburban Illinois Hardware Stores (again, plural)

Monkeys (plural) in the Suburban Illinois Hardware Stores (again, plural)

Sometimes, a story is better than what actually happened. Here’s the start of my story…

On Friday, I was driving with my family to get a copy of our house key. My toddler was sleeping in his car seat after a fun morning at the zoo, and my wife and I were listening to the 90’s alternative playlist she had made for our vacation which had gotten cut short earlier in the week (full disclosure: this playlist also had on “The Hand That Feeds”, a song recorded in 2005 for Nine Inch Nails’ brilliant With Teeth; I was willing to let this transgression pass as the song is an absolute banger). As we drove to the Buikema’s Ace Hardware on 75th Street in Naperville, my wife (who grew up in the area) said, very non-chalantly, “I can’t remember if it is this Ace or the one on Washington St. that used to have the monkey.”

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The One Question Donald Trump Needs To Be Asked Before The 2024 Election…

The One Question Donald Trump Needs To Be Asked Before The 2024 Election…

With the official announcement that hate-filled potato Ron DeSantis is entering the race for the presidency, we finally have the possibility of a candidate who could overtake former President Donald Trump. However, and maybe I’m crazy, but there seems to be a really easy way to derail the Trump campaign and, quite frankly, it fucking baffles me that no one has directly asked Trump this question.

Here it is:

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Fancy Boys Go To The Movies: Fast X

Fancy Boys Go To The Movies: Fast X

(Author’s note: Per usual, I have kept to my principal of having this review be as spoiler-free as possible. For the most part, if it isn’t in the trailer, I won’t talk about any specifics in the review.)

With the 11th film in The Fast & Furious franchise (ten stand-alone films plus Fast & Furious Presents: Hobbs & Shaw), it would be easy for director Louis Leterrier’s debut in this series to be very paint by numbers. All he would have to do is let Vin Diesel be the ultimate driving and fighting machine (and family man) that he is and let the other supporting players support him. But Leterrier, replacing Justin Lin (who left the film citing creative differences) shows us that he has a few tricks up his sleeve. His Fast X features four Oscar-winning actors, a ton of new characters (for better or worse), and the most fun and exciting new addition that Fast & Furious have given us since their best film (more on that later).

But perhaps the most impressive thing Leterrier has done was to realize that the last film, F9, was severely flawed. And you can see him making the effort in Fast X to fix those problems. Which is not to say that this film doesn’t have issues: it’s bloated (while, somehow, not giving most characters enough to do), too absurd, and has some moments that are laughable, and not in a good way.

It’s also a whole ton of fucking fun.

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